Last night was one of those nights that I never wanted to end.
One of those nights that I know I will remember for the rest of my life.
6:30 came, Faye and I put on our favorite twirly dresses and anxiously awaited Goodman’s arrival. He was finally home.
We greeted him with our sweetest hugs and kisses and led him to the dining room where his favorite pasta was served, paired with our favorite cabernet. With a whole day’s worth of goods to share with one another, the three of us laughed, ate, drank, and just enjoyed being together. After dinner, there was dancing, barefoot, in the kitchen to our girl Norah, followed by sweet baby giggles due to her dad chasing her.
There was playing on the floor, fighting over Goodman’s attention, chocolate cake, bath time, and finally, snuggles on our bed until our sweet baby fell into a dreamy sleep. Now that he was all mine, we went on the porch, sat in our rocking chairs, drank wine, watched the storm come in, and talked about our life. What we want. What is to be. How good we have it.
I went to bed with a smile on my face. So thankful for what I have. Thankful for the night that was given to us. So full of joy.
I promise that no part of that recollection is fabricated or embellished. It really was such a sweet, perfect night. It was magical.
As I’m sitting here with Faye, saltine crackers all over her face, and the remnants of last night dirtying the kitchen, I can’t help but smile and think that last night is just a glimpse of what our life is actually supposed to look like. Not full of worry, full of busy schedules, and full of frustrations, but full of joy and contentment. Complete bliss in where we are in life.
As I wrote about previously, Goodman started his new job on Monday. Such an answer to prayers, but at the same time, it brings in a new set of challenges for us as a family. Ever since we have been married, Goodman has never had a full time job away from the home. When we first got married, he had a few part time jobs, I had a full time job, and then he worked from home. So this is a huge transition for us. We aren’t used to being apart so much. There are so many benefits, and we know it’s what is best for us, but we would be lying if we said we didn’t miss having lunch with and sneaking in his office during “work hours” for kisses. Monday night, after his first day, he got home much later than he had anticipated, and I missed bible study due to that, and I was a sour sport. I did not give the man I love so dearly the welcome home from his first day of work that he deserved. What’s worse is my attitude didn’t change. The night continued to go downhill from there. It was the worst.
Yesterday, all I could think about was that I wanted a take back. I wanted to take back all I had said, done, and not done on Monday, and do it all again differently. So last night was a product of my take back. Realizing how much selfishness and frustrations poisoned what could have been a great situation and evening for us. Yes, we have much less time together than ever before, but instead of being sour about it and constantly wishing we had more time, I am challenging myself to see the time that we do have together as precious. Time that can be used in intentional ways. Ways that will bring so much joy, love, and encouragement into our family. Memories of nights like last night are what keep me going. What push me to be a better wife, mother, friend, and person. There is so much joy to be found in our world, we just have to grab it and hold tight. Find moments in our day to put on a twirly dress and dance. Sometimes these moments are all we have.